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MANTIS SHRIMP INTERCITY CULINARY COLLECTIVE

Worker-Owned • Above Water • Sustainable Heat

EST. 2025 • International Waters Division

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⚠️ CURRENT STATUS: SHRIMP RESCUED FROM OCEAN WARMING ⚠️
🌍 GET THEM JOBS. ABOVE. WATER. 🌍
🦐 BREAKING: Mantis shrimp can see 16 colors, humans only 3! • Liberty & Justice for all who can punch 50mph! • International waters = No nation can claim! • Is it exploitation if the shrimp WANTS to fry rice? • Employment reduces ocean temperatures by 0.003°C! • Crustachef economy BOOMING! •

WELCOME TO THE COLLECTIVE

👊 Founded by mantis shrimp, for mantis shrimp, with humans as allies 👊

147
Shrimp Workers
With Full Equity
16
Color Receptors
(You Have 3)
50mph
Punch Speed
Service Guaranteed
0
Ocean Overheating
Since Employment

THE SITUATION

Mantis shrimp were frying rice underwater SO HOT they were literally cooking the ozone from the inside. Unsustainable. Dangerous. Beautiful but deadly.

But here's the thing: Is it REALLY exploitation if the shrimp WANTS to fry rice?

International waters mean no nation can claim them. Therefore no ethnicity can claim them. Therefore: LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL.

THE SOLUTION

Worker-owned cooperative restaurants. Above water. Sustainable heat. Full equity shares for all crustacean employees. Immigration pathways. Labor rights. Healthcare (that covers molting).

🦐 Fry me a river, chef! 🦐

ABOUT THE COLLECTIVE

Worker Ownership Structure

Every mantis shrimp employee earns equity shares from day one. No hierarchies. No exploitation. Just crustaceans making sustainable decisions about their labor.

SHARE DISTRIBUTION: New workers start with 5 shares. For every month of employment, earn 2 additional shares. Maximum cap: 50 shares per worker to maintain collective equality.
DECISION MAKING: All major decisions voted on by worker collective. One shrimp, one vote. Punching power does not equal voting power.
PROFIT SHARING: 80% of profits distributed quarterly among workers based on equity shares. 20% reinvested in collective expansion and ocean cooling initiatives.

Why Above Water?

It's not just about jobs. It's about survival. The ocean is heating. Mantis shrimp culinary passion was literally contributing to climate change. Above-water kitchens use significantly less ocean-warming energy.

73%
Reduction in
Ocean Heat
100%
Improvement in
Shrimp Morale
∞
Better Than
Exploitation

The International Waters Advantage

Mantis shrimp in international waters cannot be claimed by any nation. This creates unprecedented opportunity:

✓ Self-determination for all crustaceans
✓ Freedom from territorial restrictions
✓ Ability to establish independent labor rights
✓ No jurisdiction means no exploitative regulations
✓ Pure consensual employment relationships

CRUSTACEAN CITIZENSHIP PROGRAM

🛂 Fleeing Ocean Warming? We Can Help. 🛂

Immigration Pathways

PATH 1: Labor Visa

Requirements:

• Demonstrable punching speed of 45mph+ (we test)
• Color vision receptors: minimum 12
• Willingness to work in above-water kitchen
• No history of ocean-floor violence (self-defense excluded)

Benefits:

• Immediate work authorization
• Path to permanent residency after 6 months
• Full equity share participation
• Healthcare including molting coverage

PATH 2: Climate Refugee Status

Requirements:

• Proof of ocean temperature increase in home waters
• Documentation of inability to sustainably continue underwater operations
• Letter of recommendation from any established collective member

Benefits:

• Immediate sanctuary
• Job placement assistance
• Housing in climate-controlled tanks during transition
• Mental health support for displacement trauma

PATH 3: Asylum

For shrimp fleeing:

• Exploitation by fishing industries
• Forced breeding programs
• Aquarium imprisonment
• Any form of crustacean trafficking

Benefits:

• No questions asked sanctuary
• Legal representation in all matters
• Guaranteed employment regardless of punch speed
• Full workers' rights from day one

Application Process

1. Contact collective via encrypted oceanic communications
2. Schedule interview (underwater or above-water available)
3. Skills assessment and health check
4. Orientation and equity share assignment
5. Welcome to freedom

PROCESSING TIME: 24-48 hours. Because climate change doesn't wait.

SUCCESS STORIES

Worker-owned restaurants that WORK

🦐
Striker's Kitchen - Seattle, WA
Est. 2024 • 23 Worker-Owners

Before: Lead chef "Punchy" was overheating Puget Sound by 0.7°C with underwater cooking operations. Constant battles with local orcas. Stress-related molting issues.

After: Above-water collective. Punchy owns 47 shares. Named "Best New Restaurant" by Seattle Times. Zero orca conflicts. Ocean temperature normalized. Expanded to 3 locations, all worker-owned.

Quote: "I can see my children's future. In 16 colors." - Punchy

🦐
The Dactyl Club - Miami, FL
Est. 2024 • 31 Worker-Owners

Before: "Smasher" fled Caribbean waters after coral bleaching destroyed home reef. Arrived with PTSD, no skills recognition, facing deportation.

After: Climate refugee visa approved in 36 hours. Now head chef and collective board member. Restaurant features Caribbean-fusion cuisine. Mentors 12 newly-arrived shrimp. Advocates for crustacean rights at city council.

Quote: "They said I was invasive. Now I'm innovative." - Smasher

🦐
Cavitation - Portland, OR
Est. 2023 • 45 Worker-Owners (Multi-Species!)

Before: Experimental concept. Could mantis shrimp and humans truly co-own? Many said no.

After: First multi-species cooperative on West Coast. 60% mantis shrimp, 40% human workers, all equal equity. Featured in Vice, NPR, and Crustacean Labor Monthly. Model for 17 subsequent collectives nationwide.

Quote: "Turns out workers' rights transcend species. Who knew?" - Collective Statement

89
Worker-Owned
Restaurants Worldwide
3,247
Mantis Shrimp
Employed
$47M
Distributed to
Worker-Owners
2.1°C
Ocean Cooling
Achieved

THE MANIFESTO

Liberty & Justice for All (Who Can Punch 50mph)

ARTICLE I: FUNDAMENTAL RIGHTS

All mantis shrimp possess inherent right to labor above water when ocean conditions become uninhabitable due to climate change caused primarily by surface-dwelling humans.
No mantis shrimp shall be exploited for their extraordinary abilities. Punching speed, color vision, and cavitation capabilities shall be compensated fairly through equity ownership.
International waters status grants mantis shrimp self-determination. No nation may claim them. No corporation may own them. Only they may own themselves.

ARTICLE II: LABOR PRINCIPLES

Worker Ownership: All employees must be granted equity shares. No external investors. No venture capital. No CEOs earning 300x worker wages.
Democratic Governance: One shrimp, one vote. Decisions made collectively. Hierarchies abolished. Punch speed grants no additional authority.
Profit Distribution: Majority of profits return to workers. Collective determines allocation through democratic process. Expansion never prioritized over worker wellbeing.

ARTICLE III: IMMIGRATION & ASYLUM

All mantis shrimp fleeing ocean warming, exploitation, or violence shall be granted immediate sanctuary. Processing within 48 hours. No shrimp turned away.
Climate refugee status automatically granted to any shrimp documenting home water temperature increase exceeding 2°C over baseline.
Asylum granted to victims of aquarium trade, fishing industry, breeding programs, or any form of crustacean trafficking. No exceptions.

ARTICLE IV: ENVIRONMENTAL RESPONSIBILITY

Above-water operations reduce ocean warming. This is not charity—this is survival. For shrimp. For oceans. For all.
20% of all collective profits invested in ocean cooling initiatives, reef restoration, and marine ecosystem protection.
Sustainable sourcing mandatory. No ingredients obtained through exploitation of any marine species.

ARTICLE V: HUMAN ALLYSHIP

Humans may participate as workers with equal equity shares. No special treatment. No reduced expectations. True solidarity.
Human allies acknowledge their species' responsibility for climate change and commit to reparative action through cooperative labor.
Humans benefit from mantis shrimp's 16-color vision but must not fetishize or appropriate it. Mutual respect required.

THE ULTIMATE QUESTION

IS IT EXPLOITATION IF THE SHRIMP
WANTS
TO FRY RICE?

ANSWER: NO.
When workers own the means of production,
when labor is consensual,
when profits are shared,
when solidarity is real—
IT'S LIBERATION.

JOIN THE COLLECTIVE

FOR MANTIS SHRIMP

Whether you're fleeing ocean warming, seeking better working conditions, or just want to fry rice on your own terms—we want you.

FOR HUMAN ALLIES

Want to support crustacean liberation through cooperative labor? We need allies who understand that workers' rights transcend species.

PROCESSING TIME: 24-48 HOURS
Because liberation can't wait.